THE DUTIES OF THE FIRST BORN

Mom is in the hospital again. Sunday she called me and asked me to come over because she was feeling faint and was worried about Dad. Not herself, natch. My father has a type of dementia and he will be 85 in November, he is a trifle unsteady on his legs!

I felt it necessary to call her family physician, she was in such pain that I could not bear to stand by and just wring my hands. The Doc told me to call an ambulance and he would meet her at the emergency room. Mom lives on a very well established dead end street. I heard the ambulance heading in our direction...I knew she was going to be very angry with me, but hey, I can handle that. All the neighbors came into their front yards and watched in concerned silence. As soon as they saw it was my Mom and not Dad, they began to head towards our house. I had to announce what was going on from the front porch while my Dad stood behind me watching in his mute helplessness.

They are running tests and I believe they will let her go home today and schedule further tests as an out patient. I hope she just had a virus attack her and knock her flat.

I want to tell you all about Genie. She is a miracle woman. She has been helping my Mom care and tend for my Dad since June. To make a long story short, Omega cried to me one night several months ago, before Genie, that I had to go tell Mom to let Dad go to heaven. That he was in too much pain and he was praying for the Lord to take him and if Mom gave her permission, he would pass on. Omega is the youngest and taking Dad's decline the hardest. My thoughts are this, Dad will go to heaven when God calls him, not a moment before. And I would never never never ask that of my Mom.....Heavens!!! Yet, I understand Omega.

Then Genie came into their lives and my Dad is a new person. She has worked in health care with the elderly since she has been 16 years old. She is a country girl, kind, generous with her love, and the most wonderful companion for Dad every day. He is not ashamed when she tends to him.....She calls him Mr. Wonderful.

Mr. Wonderful can be a handful. Several years ago Mom felt faint and passed out cracking her head open. They kept her in the hospital for observation for several days. I was staying with Dad and went home to change clothes. When I went back, he was GONE!!!!!!!

SO WAS THE CAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was PANICKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He had found the keys, driven himself the 10 plus miles into Lexington and parked at the hospital and found her hospital room! All by himself! He was sitting in a chair like the cat who ate the canary! He only forgot his jacket.

You can never give up on anyone. Their is no limits to the human spirit.

IT WAS A DARK AND DREARY NIGHT

Thunder is rumbling as I sit here and write this entry. I love thunders storms, as long as I am not driving in them.

This morning I was out running around the little town I live in. Racking my brain for something to write about. I hate to think I am experiencing writers block...again! Running has a way of turning into a mantra experience if you allow it. When I was experiencing a "clean slate" this thought surfaced....people who truly meant something to me and are no longer a part of my life.

It was triggered as I jogged past his parents house. My childhood friend R. His car is backed into their drive way, as if he may jump into it any moment and drive back to Washington State, where he has escaped to many years before. The last time I heard from him was almost three years ago. His name popped up on my caller ID. He did not leave a message, I did not return his call.

He returned home to his parents, a laid off aeronautic engineer. He took a settlement, cashed in his 401-K and headed home after 20 years. He was an alcoholic. He is an alcoholic. He hooked up with another childhood friend of mine, G. And before I knew it I was entertaining the two of them most every night! One crazy absurb night R. Turned to me and said, "If G. Will not marry you, I will." I looked from one nut case to the other..."These are my choices?......I pass." Neither on has ever forgiven me.

R. was in his parents house, climbed out on the second story roof in a sleeping bag and promptly fell asleep, He rolled off the roof fell to the ground and broke his back. They said he would never walk again, but he did. In 1997 he walked, with canes, into a funeral of yet another childhood friend of ours who dropped dead from a heart attack at 42.

And G.!!! I have written about G. before. He is a bad influence on me. I'll say no more. He is always there for me when I need him. If I ever need him again, he will be angry with me for awhile, then once again be my best friend. I miss him the most...but he is the furthest away.

And F. One of my best friends. Lost everything in her life, her family, her home, her mind. Another alcoholic. I[ve written about her before too. I opened my home to her when she lost hers. The seduction and allure of alcohol and comfort of self medication has all but erased my friend. I see her occasionaly around Lexington.....I quickly run the other way.

C. in Louisville. When I was a young mother with an infant she and I shared apartments all over the Highland Area! We had a major falling out where I said something.... I would give anything in the world to take it back. Bridget considered her the Wicked Step Mother...We always laughed about that. For many years Bridget had two very strong female influences on her development. I met C. In Murray when we first went to college in the early 70's. She was a good dear friend for many years.

Then there is S. And E. Two people I worked with at a company in Louisville for approximately 10 years! How do we loose touch like this. I loved them. I can not find them now.

People come and go. Leave an impression and they change your life. I miss every one of them. I dare not reach out to the dueling Beau's......Too complicated now that I am married! (also married a childhood friend...Life is so odd) but the others, the girls, the women, the sisters.....? Why do we allow something so precious and rare as friendship to become so lost.

A letter to my favorite item

Dear Computer,

I remember the first day I brought you home. I remember all the steps I took leading up to purchasing you. The anticipation, the hope, the expectations. Who would have thought it exceeded every single one!

Dear Camera,

I look for you still. The day you were stolen is one of the saddest days of my life. My lovely Nikon SLR F series with the two lenses. I even cried. I have never been able to replace you. Oh yes, there is that Canon, but it pales in comparison. The Minolta...HA! I gave it away! The digital gives me gray hairs! My tiny 35mm was lost! I want you back! Please come home I beg you! I know it has been seven long years, but I think of you most days!

Dear Diary,

What would I do without you! Always there with a comforting shoulder and never interrupts or judges. Never betray me nor share our secrets.

Dear Refrigerator,

Sometimes I could kick your ass!

I NEVER WANT TO DO THAT AGAIN

This past weekend we went to Louisville for the State Fair. Contrary to all my other thousands of entries about my adventures, this one was a little off the bullseye.

It started off with us stuck in traffic for 40 minutes trying to enter the fair grounds. It was a three block trek, for the love of God! It seems all the traffic control people they hired were trained...wait! they were not trained. It was all I could do not to put the car in park and rush out into the intersection and take over for those poor women. Yes, they were women! Hired purposely for this event. I was not a very good citizen and made my way into a turning lane I CREATED.....Thankfully, many followed behind me!

The fair was fun. Spent most our time in the event arena checking out the cow shows, the bunnies and all of the exhibits. There was the most fantastic amateur photography display. I'm thinking of submitting one next year. Black and white.

We stayed at a motel in another area of town. Joe and his daughter spent the late afternoon in the pool while I finished the book The Lovely Bones. It was a terrific read. It is so wonderful to read in a hotel room. No dishes in the sink calling out to you, no tomato bushes that need to be staked, no nagging guilt that you have not driven across town to visit your parents. Wonderful.

Then to a restaurant, which I have decided not to name, but I would love to! We were told the wait for a table would be a half hour and were given a small disc that lit up when your table was ready. We were there for a long time...Longer than a half hour. We sent Joe's daughter to investigate while I sent Joe to the bar. She came back with the message that we were next. Well, we weren't! Now at least I had a glass of wine to keep me occupied. When it was gone, and we were still sitting, I went over and asked. Seems that we had already been seated! I was ticked off! It appears that our pager number was erroneously given to others and we were overlooked. How long would we have to sit there waiting until they noticed? I am in the people pleasing business and this is not the way to treat your customers. We left.

McDonalds......I'll say no more.

When we returned to the hotel room the bathroom was flooded! Not really really bad, but it was in the wall coming from upstairs and puddling the entire bathroom floor. The maintenance man was there in minutes, assessed the situation and asked us if we wanted to move. That would have been too much effort, so we stayed in the room. He brought us plenty of towles to soak it up!

I was awakened at 6am by Joe head butting me. He said I laid there with both my hands covering my forehead, moaning for five minutes. I hate double beds....they are too small.

Other than all that....it was a good week-end.

ILOVE PURPLE

Anyway....I'm playing hookie again at the public library where I do most all my hookie olaying. Sometimes I go to the Book Cellar and browse through all their wonderful books, once a month allowing myself to purchase a few, that is my second favorite place to play hookie.

I go the Arborteum and sit in the vehicle and read, or write in my journal. I go sit at the Keeneland Race Track parking lot. Last week, after having to awake at 4am to make a 6am meeting, I had to go lay the car seat back and catch a few zzzzzzzzzzzzz's. The security police came over to make sure I was not a dead body.

Mainly, I'll ride around and goof off. May even travel up to the Horse Park. They have a beautiful area to just sit and comptemplate life.

Anyway, I'm at a loss for any subject matter to write about.

This past week I was on the computer (like always) and there was a knock at the door. An unfamiliar guy was standing on the other side as I cautiously opened the door and said, "Yes...?" and he pointed towards our tree in the front yard, "We're in the neighborhood, from Frankfort, just finished a job in town here and noticed that there tree is dead...About to tear down that wire! We'll take it down for you. We give estimates." We walked out to under the tree and gazed up at it. "It is pretty dead. My husband has been talking about taking it down. How much" "Oh, about $250. Shouldn't take us an hour, hour and a half. Do you want us to haul off the wood?" "I have to wait until my husband comes home and see what he wants to do?' "When will he be home" "Any minute now." "Why don't you just surprise him!" Three of this brothers climbed out of the parked truck on the road to look at the tree, realizing they had a good possibility on their hands, and were sizing up the situation. We yammered on for awhile and the leader, who sat in the truck the entire time, half in and half out of the window banged on the side and ordered them back in. "That's our old man". "He couldn't possibly be your Dad!" "Nah...He's our cousin." They left me a card and drove off. I liked them. I can not tell you why. They were young, proably in their 20's except for the cousin, who was early 40's late 30's maybe. Hard to tell because they were country people, lived hard lives on farms and looked weathered and leathered...At least old Dad did. The brothers were all nice looking in a rough way. Good Lord, the way I like them. Nice on the outside with a hint of danger just under the surface. Reminds me of all my highschool boyfriends. When Joe arrive home, he thought the price was terrific and that the tree needed to come down and the sooner the better. I called them, and they arrived on the scene in less than 15 minutes. Joseph slapped on his spikes and safety harness, a belt with the gas powered saw hanging down his side by a rope. He threw the rope around the tree, attached it to his belt/harness and began his journey up the tree. Hence, The Monkey! The tree began to come down immediately. I stationed myself on the porch and watched the spectacle......As I've said, I'm easily amused. They worked fast, efficient and together. That tree came down quickly limb by limb. He then scrambled down, and began to cut the base of the tree.....TIMBER! Joe was inside and would not look, he just made one comment, "I hope they know what they are doing!" To my eye it looked like the trunk was going to take down the cable lines....To the house next door. Great drama!!!! I was wrong, the tree fell in slow motion, in a beautiful fluid graceful swoon and landed perfectly on the ground escaping the wires easily. The four of them descended on the tree and large branches and began to saw them into easy managable pieces.....Most of them, some of the trunk was enormous and remained so. Philip (frontman/salesman) came to me while I was sitting on the porch. My entire assignment in the whole drama was to bring out bottles of water and minute maid juice blends. I did not want any of them to pass out in the heat with all that exeretion! He sat next to me and asked, or what I thought I head was this, "You got any weed?"

My mouth dropped open in astonishment! "That's a bold request!" I responded wondering if I still sported the look of the counter culture! "Don't your husband have a weed eater? They usually have gas if they do." "Oh...weed eater!" I laughed at my mistake and Philip replied when he caught wind of what I had thought,"Now we don't drink much none but we do toke up a little." Joe rounded up some gas for the electric buzz saws and the tree was cut up and stacked in the front yard in readiness for transportation to my parents and their fireplace. As I said, I'm easily amused and the Monkey Brothers were great entertainment on a hot summer.

I AM EASILY AMUSED

This past week I was on the computer (like always) and there was a knock at the door. An unfamiliar guy was standing on the other side as I cautiously opened the door and said, "Yes...?" and he pointed towards our tree in the front yard, "We're in the neighborhood, from Frankfort, just finished a job in town here and noticed that there tree is dead...About to tear down that wire! We'll take it down for you. We give estimates."

We walked out to under the tree and gazed up at it. "It is pretty dead. My husband has been talking about taking it down. How much"

"Oh, about $250. Shouldn't take us an hour, hour and a half. Do you want us to haul off the wood?"

"I have to wait until my husband comes home and see what he wants to do?'

"When will he be home"

"Any minute now."

"Why don't you just surprise him!"

Three of this brothers climbed out of the parked truck on the road to look at the tree, realizing they had a good possibility on their hands, and were sizing up the situation. We yammered on for awhile and the leader, who sat in the truck the entire time, half in and half out of the window banged on the side and ordered them back in.

"That's our old man".

"He couldn't possibly be your Dad!"

"Nah...He's our cousin."

They left me a card and drove off.

I liked them. I can not tell you why. They were young, proably in their 20's except for the cousin, who was early 40's late 30's maybe. Hard to tell because they were country people, lived hard lives on farms and looked weathered and leathered...At least old Dad did. The brothers were all nice looking in a rough way. Good Lord, the way I like them. Nice on the outside with a hint of danger just under the surface. Reminds me of all my highschool boyfriends.

When Joe arrive home, he thought the price was terrific and that the tree needed to come down and the sooner the better. I called them, and they arrived on the scene in less than 15 minutes.

Joseph slapped on his spikes and safety harness, a belt with the gas powered saw hanging down his side by a rope. He threw the rope around the tree, attached it to his belt/harness and began his journey up the tree. Hence, The Monkey!

The tree began to come down immediately. I stationed myself on the porch and watched the spectacle......As I've said, I'm easily amused. They worked fast, efficient and together. That tree came down quickly limb by limb. He then scrambled down, and began to cut the base of the tree.....TIMBER! Joe was inside and would not look, he just made one comment, "I hope they know what they are doing!"

To my eye it looked like the trunk was going to take down the cable lines....To the house next door. Great drama!!!! I was wrong, the tree fell in slow motion, in a beautiful fluid graceful swoon and landed perfectly on the ground escaping the wires easily.

The four of them descended on the tree and large branches and began to saw them into easy managable pieces.....Most of them, some of the trunk was enormous and remained so.

Philip (frontman/salesman) came to me while I was sitting on the porch. My entire assignment in the whole drama was to bring out bottles of water and minute maid juice blends. I did not want any of them to pass out in the heat with all that exeretion! He sat next to me and asked, or what I thought I head was this, "You got any weed?"

My mouth dropped open in astonishment! "That's a bold request!" I responded wondering if I still sported the look of the counter culture!

"Don't your husband have a weed eater? They usually have gas if they do."

"Oh...weed eater!"

I laughed at my mistake and Philip replied when he caught wind of what I had thought,"Now we don't drink much none but we do toke up a little."

Joe rounded up some gas for the electric buzz saws and the tree was cut up and stacked in the front yard in readiness for transportation to my parents and their fireplace.

As I said, I'm easily amused and the Monkey Brothers were great entertainment on a hot summer.

TIME TO MOVE ON

It makes life interesting to have something to look forward to. Did I say interesting? I mean tolerable! Now that the summer is winding down and fall is upon us, my thoughts turn towards spring and my birthday! Can you believe it? Joe has been on the computer looking up rates for a stay in Key West!!

This is going to be a calm weekend. Nowhere to go, no events have been planned that need to be explored, no parties to attend, no races to run, no bands to chase around, no road trip to Louisville. Sigh. Guess I will have to tackle that pesky attic that has been calling me for about 10 months to clean up. Cripes!

Now next week end is a different story. Bob Dylan and Willie Nelson are having a concert on Friday night (I hope its Friday!!), the Woodland Arts and Crafts Show is all week end, the State Fair is on in Louisville, and we are having a family Birthday celebration on Sunday! All in one week end! It is always like that. Feast or famine. I plan to attend them all!

On a lighter note, I think this house may be haunted. It is not that old, maybe 60 years, but I am not familiar with its history. Maybe something happened here, I don't know. Several months ago I awoke early in the morning (around 430am) to the sound of something in the bed room. In my groggy state, half sleep and half dream, I thought it might be one of the mice that enter our home every once in awhile. As I came to a little more, I sensed it above me, making noise on the ceiling. Flying mice! I must have turned on the bed side lamp and HORRORS!!!! a bird was flying around the ceiling in concert with the hanging fan! I leaped out of bed and drew the bed cover over my head as I ran out in panic. A BIRD!! The thing flew towards the window and that was the last I saw as I slammed the door shut behind me. Well, as slammed shut as a 60 year old door can get.

When I calmed down enough to make coffee and think about things...how did that bird get in the house? Maybe its a bat? (we have found a bat in here before)...so I crept back to the room and opened the door with broom in hand to defend myself.....and nothing....nothing.

I have thought about this for several months. Where did it go? Was I dreaming?

Then last night, right as I was falling asleep, in that once again half sleep half dream state, I felt the presence of someone....hovering over me. I felt the pressure of someone, and once again in my dream state thought it was Bridget clilmbing in bed with me.

Then came to and realized Bridget is now 24, not 4.

Creepy. But not enough to really scare me. Or frighten me. Just make me aware that ......

Dublin Ohio Irish featival

My sister Omega and I drove the four hours to a suburb in Columbus Ohio known as Dublin. They have the second largest Irish Festival in the country. It is massive! We purchased the three day pass Friday evening and began to explore the village. We had to park and be shuttled to the event. Parking near to the park was impossible, so the bus was a nice treat.

The Dublin Irish Festival is Music, Food, and Beer. Their are four major stages with various styles of music and dance. The Traditional Irish Music tent at the North entrance was the largest of the four. I think because it appealed to the broadest audience. The food courts were situated everywhere so no one ever went hungry or thirsty!

Omega did not sleep well Friday night and dropped me off early in the morning. I wandered around by myself till mid afternoon. I had a wonderful time. I even found a small musician tent that was so remiesince of the Music festival in Ennis (Ireland). The musicians were all jamming together. Violins, duborar, Irish whistles, mandolins playing the traditional Irish music......transported me back to those wonderful pubs Joe and I stumbled into in late May.

The Celtic Rock tent was tucked back in the far end of the park. I had located it on the map of the festival and was determined to locate it well before Saw Doctors took the stage, 10pm that evening.

So, I was there scooping it out at 1:30. Low and behold, the band known as TEMPEST was playing. Has anyone in the West Coast heard of this band? They absolutely were great. Advertised as Folk music....I must say I have never heard fold music ever performed that was before. They had the best stage presence I have seen in some time. And the instrumental driving rock defies description.....they were so good, I purchased an album!

When Omega finally arrived, I had staked out an area left of the stage on the grass situated right in front of the arrival area of the musicians. One guy came over the fence and was heading into the crowd, he had a Saw Doctor pass around his neck. I stopped him and asked if any of the Saw Doctors were there yet.....he said, "No they went on at 10pm"

Guess what, he was a Saw Doctor...I felt like a FOOL!

Omega was put out with him and wanted to shake her fist at him all day Sunday!

GET THAT WASP OFF MY SANDWICH

Words fail me. I knew that I loved the music and the band is famous for its great shows. I was prepared to have a rollicking wonderful time, but I was truly amazed at just how dynamic, exuberent, tight, how much fun this band was live! I knew it, I felt it. I was not disappointed and then some, and then some and then some.

Omega and I saw them Saturday night at 10pm, the final act on the stage, and then again Sunday afternoon. Both shows were spectacular. Each different due to the diversity of the two crowds. Saturday night being the drinkers and late night rockers. The singing along with the band was more pronounced Saturday, but Sunday there was more energy in the crowd which included a lot of kids. Dancing and singing and just the most wonderful group experience I have had in a long time. Seeing the Saw Doctors is a Happening!

The die hard fans were up front to dance and sing along with the songs. Yet, when it was time everyone under the tent was able to sing along with HAY WRAP! How hard is yelling, HAY!! HAY!! The song is delivered in machine gun rapid fire intensity with the Irish accent. But Peggy and I both knew when to Scream...I mean sing.... "GET THAT WASP OFF MY SANDWICH!" I truly wish I could have taken you all with me. Maybe next year.

Its been a while since I have had so much fun. Maybe about two weeks.