Friday, February 24, 2012

Tardy Thursday Thirteen

I am blissfully happy.

Don't know why! Just feel that everything is coming up roses for me and my Baby. I was at Walmart thinking, "Of course it's my day off and the temp is 30 degree's down from yesterday!" and immediately added "But the sun is shining!!" and I felt it. The awareness of all things good.

What was I doing at Walmart? Besides the usual cat food run? I was replacing my silly smart phone with a Go Phone. My plan with AT&T is not eligible for an upgrade until July. The SMART phone outsmarted me (once again) and will not charge. The phone has been put out with me for quite some time. Manifesting itself when I dropped it and the back cover went flying under an unwavering counter -forever!! It had a swing out key pad so I could not just slap it into a skin so it has been very angry ever since. No duct tape this time as was the fate of my last phone, a lovely Hello Moto. So now I have a $14.99 Go Phone, which we all know will last through a nuclear blast.

Anyway, Keeping with the theme from several days ago........

13 Indications that you are growing OLD!!

1) Every time you bend down to pick something up you grunt.

2) Sometimes when you laugh very hard you pee a little!

3) You check the weather before going out. How Old is that!!

4) When ever you hear the latest/newest music you go "Yuck!! The Beatles were so much better!"

5) You remember the Beatles.

6) Your feet hurt from standing on them all day and if someone asks you if you need anything it's all you can do to not say, "Could you give me a foot rub?"

7) You buy crappy shoes for comfort - I once wrote a whole post about this titled "I use to be Cool"

8) You think you are still cool, but you are not.

9) You can start a sentence with "Son, when I was younger....."

10) You almost choke when some young whipper snapper says, "Way back in the 1960's......." Remember this would have been you talking about the 1920's at their age. It hurts.

11) You can not operate a lap top without help from some whipper snapper.

12) You go to your High School reunion and everyone looks so old!!

13) People ask you if you knew Methuselah.

Other Thursday 13's

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

The Tell Tale Signs

I was dismayed a few weeks ago when I was erroneously told it was Fat Tuesday. One would think living so close to the center of the whole Fat Tuesday experience one would get the date correct! "Oh no" I inwardly whine, "I have to choose something to give up for Lent!" But a quick glance at the calendar told me I had several more weeks to enjoy whatever it is that I will sacrifice for 40 days.

Don't ask why. It's the Catholic in me.

So, it was officially Fat Tuesday last night and I heard Beale Street calling. All day people from all walks of life where telling me that was the place to be!

I knew Joe would be shoo in for that type of fun. My approach did not have to be subtle at all, just an assurance that I would drive and we would be home by 11pm! Ha!! Ain't life grand!

But it was not to be. Joe was working late and I had to embrace the fact that I am sliding into a certain acceptance that accompanies the aging process. Years ago, I might have just headed down there myself with the certainty that I would run into someone I knew.

Not any longer.

The aging process is a nasty beast. Not only are you startled by that stranger in the reflection of any type of glass when you realize that stranger is YOU but you have to accept that your mothers hands are now your hands! In the past you would stagger from the cramped confines of the car after a lengthy car trip - now it's just the five minute drive to the liquor, I mean grocery store.

Not to mention the punishment of a stinging hang over if you throw caution to the wind and have that third beer. Maybe I am just out of practice. Yea, that's it! I'm not practicing much anymore, so strike that off as a possible Lenten sacrifice.

Then there is the humiliation of being over looked and worse, not being seen at all! It still does not stop me from flirting. I will ask to see an ID and if they are relatively good looking I can't help myself and say coyly, "You are much more handsome in person....", this type of remark always evokes some type of reaction. Usually they SEE YOU at that point. And they always smile. Sometimes they get all puffed up, stand up straighter and glance at the photo, "Oh come on. Maybe some time ago....." it's fun to make someones day.

But I digress.

That happens a lot too. Loosing track. Loosing things. Loosing your hair, your mind.

So, there was to be no debauchery or depravity on Beale Street this night.

Acceptance of the situation without much resistance or regret is another Tell-Tale sign of traveling over the hill.

Yet what a fantastic night I had! The University of Kentucky was getting their lunch handed to them at half time, so I switched over to JUSTIFIED (man oh man! Everyone should watch that show, it's so good) and watched it not once but twice because Joe came home.

Then I reluctantly watched the second half of UK verses Mississippi State and they came from behind and won!!

Another sign? Sleep does not come easily!!

Monday, February 20, 2012

Lay it On Me, Daddy-O

Recently I have taken a review course on Customer Service that reinvigorated my waning skills. Really? Customer service skills are so elementary that at times you are surprised that you have to be reminded.

But reminded you must because any time spent with the general public will make you want to go postal.

From my refresher course I was struck by the main idea of treat your guests as you would like to be treated! Sinfully simple!

So, as silly as it sounds, I decided to treat every guest with the utmost respect and to be extremely charming as to ensure they have a positive experience. This entails answering repetitive questions over and over such as ....

"How do you get to the So and So?",

"Where are your bathrooms?"

"How much is this?"

"Can I have four quarters?"

"Where does all the money go?"

"Why is it so expensive?"

"Do you think Elvis is really dead?"

"Do you get tired of hearing this music every day?"

"You must love working here!!"

"Did you meet Elvis?"

Most the time it is fun and most the time people are really great. A lot of the time I get to meet people who actually did know Elvis and those are the best days.

So, I am half way through my day. A surprisingly very busy day and we asked each other the question "Where are all these people coming from??!!" but it was a pleasant diversion from the typical "off season". But busy busy busy. The non-stop kind.

I am being charming and pleasant as to ensure a positive experience. A man and woman approach the counter and she lays down some clothing to purchase. The husband and I strike up a conversation about where all the proceeds go, does Lisa Marie ever make an appearence etc. etc. etc. for a few seconds. I ask the wife, because this is the RULE OF THUMB, women do not like you talking to THEIR MAN, so I always engage the female (men are so much easier to talk to ,but alas....)

"So, is he going to be an Elvis fan after today?" I asked her referring to her husband.

"If his mother couldn't convert , far be for me to be able to achieve the impossible".

I ramble on (I suppose) as I rang up her purchases, "I was never a fan until I began working here. Realizing how generous he was and his impact on the culture that still exists today! It's hard not to be a fan".

She raises her head to look at me in the eye, "Who are we talking about?" she asks.

I wanted to reach across that counter and smack her smug face. I screamed out loud in my head, YOUR HUSBAND YOU IDIOT" but I didn't remembering the mantra, "Treat others as you wish to be treated...."

And I just smiled and said, "That will be $95 dollars"

If you wonder why I need to be reminded to be NICE constantly, that is why. Some people are just condescending and I just have to learn to live with it, forget it and move on to the next person, it just may be Elvis' realtor.

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Thursday 13

A day off! Sweet Joy!!

I am off to the library to pick out a new book. I just finished Tender is the Night, by F. Scott Fitzgerald and though I was not in love with any of the characters I admit to having a significant intake of breath at the conclusion of the novel accompanied by a rush of emotion.

Maybe it was just the beauty of the prose. The sadness and tenderness used to describe the slow painful fading of Dick Diver's persona as he disappeared into the obscurity of small town New York. I have decided to take a little time to absorb the story and not rashly rush on to the next book -( I am so excited I am ahead of my two book a month commitment for 2012!)

Dick Diver should have seized his moment. He should have put down the damn bottle and realized what a lucky Dick he actually was. Is it coincidence that the name "Don Draper" sounds like Dick Diver?

I think not.

Enough reflection. I picked up my copy of This Side of Paradise but decided to save it for later. Instead I am headed to the library with a list of books.

Here are 13 books on that list from Good Reads.

1) Irish Journal - Heinrich Boll , anything Irish and travel I will devour.

2) Across Five Aprils - Irene Hunt, love Civil War fiction.

3) You can't get there from here - Gayle Foreman, more travel, can't get enough.

4) Travels with Charley, John Steinbeck, classic I have not read and I find classics are the best.

5) The Blue Nile - Alan Mooreland, see the theme here, the pattern!

6) Ayesha, the return of She - H. Rider Haggard - Love his books and have not read anything for a long long time. Read She about 20 years ago (maybe) and was stunned!! So I will love this finding this.

7) The Camel Bookmobile - Masha Hamilton

8) My Masai Life - Robin Wiszowaty. Ever since reading Out of Africa, I have had a love of all African books.

9) Too close to the Sun - Sara Wheeler

10) The Splendid Outcast - Beryle Markham, I will get this book if I can find it. I may make a trip to the local bookstore.

11) Battle Cry of Freedom - James McPherson. I am either going to pick up an African memoir or a Civil war novel! That seems to be the trend.

12) The Sweetest Dream - Doris Lessing

13) Dream of the Blue Room - Michelle Richmond. If I can find it, this is the ONE I will most definitely check out or pick up at the bookstore.

More Thursday Thirteen HERE.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Anatomy of a Valentines Day

It began like most mornings this time of year. The sun rising over an overcast grey winter sky. The chill of yesterdays rainy sleet forgotten with the weak assurance a warmer day. After all, it's Valentines Day!

While concoting an incredibly tasteless corn beef and hash breakfast I made the rash decision to forgo dinner at a local chain restaurant and indulge instead with T-bone steaks, maybe rib eye's, and a bottle of red wine. Served with romantic candles in the privacy of home!

All that was left was to make the trip to the grocery and pick up the provisions for my amorous venture after work. I had the menu memorized by the end of the day, adding and subtracting and had arrived at the most appealing meal ever imagined!

And then.......

The car would not start. Stuck in the employee parking lot with panic rising in accordance to the diminishing daylight.

A quick call to my Love. "THE CAR WON'T START!!"

"Do the lights come on?"

"Yes! I just got a new battery not so long ago!"

"Where are you?"

"The parking lot at Elvis World!"

"I'll be right there."

Oh how I love him! No rebukes, no fussing, no nothing.

Just "I'll be right there." As beautiful and as lovely as "I love you" and more substance than a box of chocolates.

"Try putting it in neutral then back to park. Then try to start it."

"Oh!!! It started!"

"Come on home"

Damn. There goes the trip to the liquor store for the wine, Kroger's for the steak, and the bakery for some kick butt cup cakes! Rats! My plans dashed at the last minute!

I found a bag of frozen raw shrimp in the freezer, sea food boil in the cupboard. A box of chocolate cake mix and powered sugar and just enough left over coffee for a tasty frosting. Potato's and chicken and green beans - that was our Valentine dinner.

Oh and just enough coconut rum for two cocktails.

Never was a more fantastic dinner.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Tender is the Soul

Thought I would throw down a post just to make sure I don't totally let go again.

I am reading Tender is the Night and am totally in awe of F. Scott Fitzy. I am having slight flashbacks to High School and reading The Great Gatby. The man was a true master of prose even though I am half way through the book and do not like nor sympathize with any of the characters.

The other night we watched a movie called The Runaways and I dislike it for the same reasons. And I like/love Joan Jett!

I have embarked into a frenzy driven rush to find a new job that has led to one interview and dashed hopes when I did not receive a call for a second interview. I was definitely under the impression that he was going to call me back!! Why ask when I would be available to meet the "other two"? great Balls of Fire. But I have not given up hope. It's just slowed down.

Maybe the fact I have them a bogus SS# 123-45-6798 made them reconsider. I am not giving my SS on an on-line application. The nerve!

Anyway, I'm OK. Especially compared to the likes of the characters in Tender is the Night!!