Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Psychology 101

Every so often I would pay attention while in class during my first attempt at impersonating a college student. What I am remembering right at this moment is a sketch of a beautiful young woman, happy, smiling, all pulled together. Under the illustration was this statement, "How she sees herself." Next to it was a second illustration of a rather average looking girl with her hair all askew, one earring on the other ... lost. Under the picture was the startling announcement, "How you really look."

I remember thinking, "Good Lord!. Is this possible! Are we truly clueless about our real selves!?!"

Apparently, yes.

My daughter was here for the week end and naturally that meant a slew of picture taking. I am much more comfortable BEHIND the camera.

The scenario went like this....

I informed the men (my hubs and my cousin from Los Angeles also visiting), "I promised Bridget I would take her to T.J. Maxx but she has conceded to go Target. We will be back in hour and then we'll go to the Festival."

"You mean the Target on the way to the Festival?"

Damn, he had me there and with that we wer rushed out the door!

When we arrived at the juke Joint Festival I had neither my camera nor sun block. Thank God for SPF 15 face moisturizer or I would have been burnt up by the time we located a $10 bottle of Bullfrog. the going rate at the tiny down town Clarksdale drugstore.

There was nothing I could do about the camera other than every so often I would say to darling Bridget, "Can I see that?" and take a few artistic shots. Artistic to this delusional messed up one earring woman.

This is how it is. At sometime you have to give it up. You have to let go of the delusional state you operate in. That face looks back at you every morning is near retirement age. You no longer look like a fresh young thing right out of High School who shunned make-up until well into her 30's. The woman who is on the hunt for a miracle is that same woman who appears next to Bridget in all these photo's.

Great God, seeing yourself on a computer screen is like having a glass of cold water thrown into your face.

This is how I see myself - Disclaimer, this is the only picture I could find on my thumb drive of me as approximately a 20 year old. I am the one looking down at something! Probably the dog trying to get in the picture. See how long my hair is and how skinny I am in my empire line mini-dress? Somewhere in my demented mind I still think I semi look like that!

Imgine my horror that I look more like this!

Is this SHOCK therapy?

Despite all the revealing and shocking photographs, we had a quite excellent time. The pictures were good too. Damn it all!
Sorry for the small print! Can't seem to edit the font size. Damn Blogger. I have a good mind to switch to Word Press. And I just might.


Lisa :-] said...

You look fine, Mary! I don't see one gray hair! (only her hairdresser knows for sure... lol!) I am in the same boat, though... I hate pictures of me, and I really hate looking too closely in the mirror. I look more like my mother/older sisters every day.


You LOOK marvelous. I EMBRACE my old age with passion. FAT, gray hair and all. Glad you had a blast with your daughter. take care.

Nelle said...

I feel the same way when I see myself in a mirror. Where have the years gone and the youthful skin? I had posted a pic on FB and one of my friends airbrushed it and mailed it back to me and said "USE THIS". I didn't know how to react but I used it. lol The older I get the more I realise that true beauty comes from within.

Gerry Geelong said...

Nice read and enjoyable post, and great pictures.
I have blogger as well as, and find it long winded when trying to comment on peoples site. having a like button as in wordpress.

Gerry Geelong said...

ps, although I follow your lovely blog, those robot words do not always work. so you probably miss out on visits...

Lori said...

Well I think you look great!! But I know what you mean. I hate seeing pictures of myself right now. Inside my head I'm 18!