Monday, September 05, 2005

Labor Day and I am depressed and sad

I am getting ready to go for my walk. Something I have been reduced to doing since my knee will not allow me to run anylonger....or squat, or kneel. I think maybe I should go to a Doctor if it continues.

I'm thinking that I would like to win the lottery. I do not want to work. Is this true? Or is it that I do not want to work at the job I breathlessly said yes to last Monday? I had a gut feeling not to do it. Now that I am, I know my gut was correct. I need to study to pass the Insurance License thing. And if I pass, there is no guarantee that I will receive the license! Because of me and my KY taxes. Too boring to explain, but I wish I had borrowed that $100 from my Mom 15 years ago.

I find myself becoming more and more listless. I do not write in my book jnl..even though there is plenty to write about. It is just too much effort. Which leads me to believe I am depressed. I am homesick. I miss my family. I miss being familiar with everything. I miss taking pictures. This part of Indiana is so boring.....(sorry for that, but it is). I wonder how long Joe and I will be trapped here?

I went through the Sunday paper yesterday and chose several classified ads for advertising sales. That is what I wanted to do, and I should have pursued that. Not been waylaid by dreams of making big bucks.

We go home next weekend to celebrate my Moms birthday, along with Daniels and Chris'. Hurray. The assignment is hero's for our next Round Robin challenge and I want to take a picture of my Dad.....and my Mom. She is my hero also.

I did not hear from CCE regarding the three positions I applied for. I did not receive a return call from US Foods. That depresses me a lot. Guess I am just feeling sorry for myself. In the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina I should be ashamed of myself.

I need that walk to clean my brain and come up with some Plan "B's".

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