Monday, September 19, 2005

Light at the end of the tunnel


I know my retirement from the work force is going to have to end very soon. I have an appointment for my second interview for the communication company this afternoon and I guess I will try my hardest to get the job. I really never have tried very hard to be the best I can be at any job I have had. I know that I have great things inside of my if only I could find that one thing that I love. At this point in my life I am realizing that I have let it pass me by. If I could wave a magic wand and return to the young girl I was at 15, I would inhabit her body for the next seven years and make her get a degree in Journalism. I would have loved it. I could have done it. Yet, here I am a 50 year old woman who has little skills other than being a very good b.s.er and very smart. I would not be so lazy or so unmotivated if I were involved with what I love.

They say it is never too late. Well, I am unmotivated at this moment to return to school and pursue another career. Yet, it is very tempting.

How many times do I have to tell myself I am lost? I am deflated and uninspired living in the heartland. I miss my beautiful south.

I may grab my camera and go for a long long walk. Certainly I can find something of beauty or strength or interest to photograph?

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