It Ain't Shakespeare

Something today reminded me of a similar occurrence two years ago when I was readying the house in Kentucky to go on the market. It involved a trip to the hardware store and the drive home. We had picked up a sheet of drywall that proved too large to fit into the car!

Oh nay! We made it fit! Laying it flat, extending the length of the inside of the car, including half the front seat. We drove home sitting on the edge of the seat, hunched forward with the dry wall resting against the back of our necks. Any quick stops and we would have been decapitated. We laughed the entire drive.

Not that I drove around on the brink of beheading myself today, but I did make a trip to the hardware store to purchase plumbing supplies. I had to return and exchange a do-hickey as I allowed the clerk to help me choose the right thingy but the wrong size. I almost had to go back again because I once again allowed them to give me the right size, but wrong thingy. Not being a plumber, I was clueless but my plumber kept rolling his eyes at the ineptitude of today's Hardware Clerks.

Which brings me to the secondary subject of today's essay....I went to my hand written journal from 2005 looking for an entry about that drive from Home Depot. I searched in vain. Yet, I had the most fascinating half hour of reading. My writing style, the ease and flow! It was incredible. I must have been writing every day .... about nothing! Just my observations, feelings, fears, thoughts, selling the house in KY and the long drives to this strange land called North East Indiana.

Why did I stop? Not that I ever really stopped, it just tapered off to an entry here and then one there. I stopped examining things around me. I stopped looking for things to describe and wonder about. Also I have stopped looking through the lens of my camera.

Recently I have had the urge to write write write again. And maybe in time I will regain the flow and the ease. I long to pick up the camera again and not be self conscious. Why I am so self conscious up here is beyond me. Maybe it has something to do with my malaise.

I stopped looking and there by stopped seeing.

As I prepare to leave, I want to document this fascinating area so I will always remember my time here.

The beauty that is here if one just looks for it.


I sat in the parking lot of a Menards struggling with a hand held computer that was crashing on me. I looked out the window in a snit of frustration when a family of four Amish came walking through the parking lot. A tiny girl-child dressed in an exact replica of her mothers outfit. Little white bonnet, short legs in thick stockings, calf length dress and over coat, walking quickly with determination to keep up with her parents and sibling.

Very few places on this earth that you could witness such a beautiful sight.

And......it was raining.

I'm ready for to fade into my own parade

I'm so ready to go. Staying here is excruciating. In my heart and mind I have left already. Today for instance, the Big Muck-ed-d-mucks (is that even a word?) where in my territory. What was I doing? A month ago I would have been on my knees lighting candles at the sanctuary for the Blessed Mother. Yet today I just thought "oh well" and was chatting away with mortgage companies,making appointments for a plumber, fretting about the damn driveway, making strategic plans concerning Alphawoman, yakking it up with S., having lunch at Mancino's, filling out necessary paper work for Joe's company and wondering if anyone will notice I am wearing running shoes. (a big no-no in this biz, but I had an excuse ready...my shoes got wet and these were in the vehicle!!)

I'm gone. Mentally I have checked out. But, for another four weeks I will go through the motions and keep things floating until they find a replacement ... for me (no way!!).

I hope I can do it.

Freedom's just another word for nothing left to loose.

It's wonderful.

(I'll be crying if they yank my chain).

Another note!!!

I knew it !! I just knew it!!! There is a new blog out there called MY LIFE IS AN OPEN BLOG! (should have "domained" that too!)

Yet another note...they upped the offer to $1500

Questions Questions Everywhere and Not A Thought to Think!

Okay Andrea!! This is why I did not post a picture of my new do! Because there are no pictures. I tried to get several shots in the bathroom, using the mirror, but they did not turn out (as you can see!!) They usually only included the top of my head. This one makes me look ...exasperated! My darn camera! And the fact I dropped it a while ago (yes, a Nikon d-50 I dropped it like an idiot) and wrecked the every day lens. This lens is a long focal length and is difficult for anything slightly close-up.

So there is the top of my new do.

As for the domain name. I think she is passing on it. I told her that I had contacted Go-Daddy and they had quoted me a ridiculously low amount, from $79 - $159.

She immediately offered me $500.

The reason I hesitate to write about the Domain Name is in case she is googling it and finds this (or that or any entry) about the name.

Sentimental reasons make me keep it, want to keep it.

And the fact that a second Appraisal company came back with five pages of intense examination of the name and an ending quote of US $2450.00.

She passed.

Yesterday, in anticipation of the report, I was thinking about all the different ways you could use my Domain Name. And how I would kick myself in the butt if it became enormous with the right Marketing strategies, which it could.

You guessed it....

Can't you envision it!!

Alphawoman Magazine.

Alphawoman Cosmetics.

Alphawoman Power tools.

Alphawoman Cookbook's.

It's mind boggling.

And worth so much more than $500!

In the chilly hours and minutes of Uncertainty

One night Joe was watching TV and drinking beer and got persuaded into pledging to the Public Television Channel that transmits in this area. All because he was lured with the joy of owning the "British Invasion" CD. All four of them!

They arrived when he was out of town. I popped it into the player on my most recent trip to the South, soon to be Home, and enjoyed every one of them as helped pass the four hour drive.

Many of the songs I had not heard for a very long time. Some with good reason.

Isn't it amazing how these sounds can transport one back into a decade that is so long ago that I recently heard in a movie some young smart Aleck say, "You know we are closer to the 2060's than the 1960's". He may be a smart aleck, but he missed several math classes.

It still hung with me , because I understand that is how they think of the music from that time. I even cringe at "Henry the 8th"...but I know every single word.

Sadly missing from the CD's are The Dave Clark Five. (and the Stones and Beatles).

Joe told me the Dave Clark Five were not a British band!

Blasphemy!

Aren't they?

They made me Glad All Over and I patiently listened through "Georgie Girl" "What New Pussycat", sang along with "She's not there" and "Gimme Some Loving" waiting to hear it.

I was astonished to realize that the Foundations were a British Import and not from Motown!! Gosh, I loved Baby Now That I Found You I Can't Let You Go.

Any way, I had the idea for an entirely different entry, but got caught up singing inside my head and this is the result.

What's in a Name?

A very interesting development has risen!

I have a domain name (a great domain name) that recently was going to expire. I hemmed and hawed about renewing it and waited until the 11th hour and then paid for an additional three years. Granted, I do not use this domain. I coveted it, it became available about two years ago and I snapped it up.

Someone else wants this domain! Someone else was watching, waiting, hoping that I would let it slip away.

They contacted me today. I was shrewd. I had a hair appointment, so I e-mailed her and told her that I was open.....as I was heading out the door my cell phone rang! It was her. Ahhhhhh.....she really really wants this domain name!

Off to the hairdresser I go carrying along pictures of Ali's new do.

This is my luck with hairdressers and I digress. Several years ago while living in Lex I always went to S.D.U. because I loved Don. I went in this one day, I always put a lot of time in between hair cuts...this was before gray...and my hair was really shaggy. I noticed he had lost an extreme amount of weight and before I knew it I was hearing all about the break-up of he and his wife and how she had packed up the child and left him for someone else. Someone she had been seeing for awhile. He suspected, but loved her too much to pay any credence to those suspicions. He was going through the credit card bills and cell phone bills and realized he was being cuckolded. He was so upset,so angry and so hurt. The more emotional he became telling me about the betrayal, the more hair was piling up on the floor beneath me.

I am the type that always keeps my eyes closed until it's over.

When it was over, my hair was as short as a little boys.

I got use to it, and in time looking back on the pictures of me with the shear hair cut, I kind of liked it.

Back to tonight....I got my hair colored (lots of gray these day) and was sitting at the sink getting the ends brought up to speed when Michael (I love men hair dressers, always have, always will) begins to tell me about the break up with his girlfriend of three years. Passionately telling me the story!

Flash Back!!!!

When I was seated in the chair, I thought long and hard about pulling out Ali's pictures, but in the end I did. He studied them and then brought out the scissors...snip snip snip.

Its fabulous! He did not cut off all of it and it is no where at all like Ali's, but he did cut it shorter than normal and if I like it and get enough compliments, we'll go higher the next time.

He is one great hair stylist.

And we sang Herman and the Hermits songs while he cut away. (I am living large)

........

Then I go back home with this fabulous hair cut feeling like a million dollars and call the Domain Seeker.

What is a domain name worth? I told her that I would contact Go Daddy and see what they suggest.

After that we talked girl talk for about 10 minutes. I like her.

Maybe I won't ask for $25,000.

Man, my hair looks good!

Cleaning, Sorting, Scrapbooking........

I have been working my butt off......not! But, I have made some headway in cleaning out several closets, the cabinets under the snack-bar (now that took half the day!)and under my bed!

I kept running across postcards, pictures, cut out newspaper articles, Birthday cards, old programs, menus, maps. All the things a high-powered Pack Rat would keep.


And why do I keep all this stuff? Because some day I am going to put my collection in a scrapbook.

Scrapbook? Where is that Scrapbook? Under the bed, of course. I had located a three hole punch (which I had been searching for months ago) in the cabinet and I put it to good use. No, I do not have a fancy smancy Scrapbook with themes and lots of ribbons and lace. Mine is not cutsie at all (well, maybe just a little). And as I began to put it together today, it is not even in chronological order.

Where ever it fits....there it went.


I'm pleased with the results.

Guess its time to start cleaning and sorting again.

Closet Cleaning Diversion

You find a lot more in closets than just Monsters

I'm at home this week-end taking the house apart. I first went to Walmart and purchased several rather large containers and a couple of smaller ones. I think my first plan of action is to de-clutter the house before the Realtors pay me a visit.




I started with the back closet and began pulling out clothing I have not worn since moving here. It goes into the Goodwill bag. Hiding on the bottom of the closet is Bridget's wedding veil and princess crown, my bag of Christmas cards and wrap I scored at Value City with my $20 coupon, a case of note cards (and I do mean case),
a child's map of the world, a wedding gift, and a plastic sweater box full of photographs that spilled all over the floor when I dragged it out.

Among one I picked up is this jewel. Bridget and Tara. The blond one and the dark one. I love this photo.

Anything to get a break.

Maybe I'll go make some banana bread and look through photo's.

Am I Boring You??

I have not written much on the New Girl in the office. She is 22 and I have come to....like her. Today she told me that her vaca to NYC last week was fun, okay. 'The fact that it was Passover and we could only eat certain things kind of sucked."

"You're Jewish?"

"I don't tell many people." she murmured. "We avoid eating anything with corn it it, corn syrup and the such. Do you know how many things are made with corn syrup? So we eat this bread. Its special. It's flat and not very tasty."

"Why?"

"When we were slaves escaping we could only take a few things along with us. Our bread, we could only let it dry on stones before we had to move on. I suppose we continue to do it to remind ourselves of the suffering we had to endure."

"Like the 40 years wandering in the desert?"

She nodded and said nothing more.

"You know I'm Catholic? Well, we don't study the old testament too much, at least I never did. When Joe and I joined this huge mega church in Lexington I loved it. I even took a bible study class and would call Joe all the time and say, "did you know....." and he would think, 'you silly old Catholic'. He made a really good joke about it."

"What?" she asked.

"Well, earlier that year Bridget and I had traveled to Tampa to see my friend D. We took the Amtrak to West Palm Beach to see my other pal G. The Amtrak! My God. First of all, we could not board it in Tampa, we had to be bused to Loveland to board, because of some huge fires going on...."

"Oh, oh! Did you hear about the Jet Blue that was stranded on the run way and no one could even go to the bathroom and stuff?"

(......Wait a minute! I'm in the middle of a story, a good story, and I am standing up and even adding body language! And she inturrups me to ask about Jet Blue!! What's with this kid?? Is my story that boring? Can't she wait till the end to inturrupt.....)

"Yea...yea... I heard. Anyway, we return to Tampa on the Amtrak and it takes us alomost 24 hours to get back. It was suppose to be a 3 hour trip. We almost missed our plane!. So, I'm telling Joe about the The Isrialites wandering the desert with Moses for 40 years, and in actuality, the trip should have only taken three days!

Joe responds, 'That would be six days by Amtrak.'"

She did laugh.

Crazy kid.

Random Phone Conversations #457

I called my pal in Lex around 515pm and got his voice mail.

"I'm just leaving work and I bet you are home in a bubble bath!"

I was wrong, he was ringing in as I was leaving the message.

"You'll never guess what happened? BB came into town and they went right to my area. Right to a HD and the cooler was filthy. I never noticed it was filthy! Never. Maybe because I am not really tall enough to see the top. I told them that they had bags of dirt up there...."

"Everybody's HD's are like that! For God's sake, the coolers are in the garden area! Crap flying around everywhere. One dirty cooler is not going to ruin your career. All our trucks were parked today. We sent the drivers home around 9am."

"Why? I know one dirty cooler is not going to kill me, I just hate that BB is such an anal snot."

"Because the system was down. 125 sales centers were effected! Remember he will be over CD in Louisville too. And I think anal is his middle name."

"Oh, that! Yea we knew about it and we called in all our orders. Our trucks were on the road. We are da bomb."

"Yea.....Da Dirty Bomb."

When the winds of changes shift

It seems I can not focus enough to compose a real entry about what is going on, so here is the fragmented version.

I think I have a pinched nerve! It came on me last night as I sat at the computer in my left hand. It goes away when I stand up and leave. Strange. I had one years and years ago after a car accident and it went away in time!

I have been checking out the MLS for the Louisville area and it appears that you can get so much more BANG for your BUCK on the Indiana side of the Ohio River. So it seems we will continue to be Hoosiers!!

I feel like a lame duck at work. I told my supervisor about Joe's transfer and gave him a June 1st date. I have this odd feeling that I am going to miss him, Smart Aleck #2, and the Hunk.

J. is staying at my sisters "other" house in Louisville. They took off for a skiing trip for Spring break. I did not call her in time to arrange the passing of the key. My nephew was to come to the rescue. I asked him to put the spare key under the recycling bin on the back porch. I neglected to specify which back porch!! At 1030 Sunday night J. is frantically searching for said key! All's well that ends well.

It has been established that the Garmin Streetpilot GPS system I gave J. is the best Christmas present ever. Period.

It's 636 AM and I am sitting at the computer in my pj's. I am suppose to be out and working at 7am. Lame duck syndrome.

While driving yesterday I remembered I had to pay that damn fine for that damn traffic violation that I tried to fight without a lawyer (and I would have won too if I wan't such a tight wad! I have at several times since experienced that the traffic lights are not in sync therefore that cop could not have been certain I ran a yellow/red light, because by-God I did not!!). I was relieved to learn it was due on the 2nd and I have a two week grace period to pay it before my liscence is revoked.

Taxes are done and we get money back! Yay!!! Enough to cover the traffic fine! Yay. It was a lot less that I thought it was going to be, by the way. (the fine)

I'm beginning to really like the Cha-Cha's on The Amazing Race.

I'm still cheering for Billy Ray on Dancing with the Stars though Joey is spectacular.

I wish I could wave a magic wand and be moved.

GOING HOME

My phone rang around 1pm.

"I got the job in Louisville", Joe declared in a matter of fact tone.

A few moments later, I was on my personal cell phone calling my Mom, my daughter, my Sisters, my pals in Lexington and dancing the dance of JOY in front of a Menards store in a far reaching North town in Indiana.

I'm going home!

I lived in Louisville all during the 1980's. I left in 1990 after receiving my BSBA from the University of Louisville and just wanting to move on.

Now I'm moving back.

I'm thrilled and joyous.

I'm in shock.

Joe starts his new position on Monday.

This means I get to sell the house again.

Let's hope that this time there are no trips to the hospital.

I'M GOING HOME!!!!!!!!!!

HEAVEN ON EARTH

Lexington Cemetery


My favorite statue. I dream of being there when it snows to capture her catching snow flakes.



A blanket of delicate white.