Monday, November 01, 2004


It would seem that I am heading to Atlanta. Zorro and I go to Roanoak next week so he can participate in a placement test for management jobs. I doubt that will work out, so I am starting to roll around in my head that I may be in Atlanta in a few months.

I don't know. I'm scared as anything. This morning I woke up and thought about the time I moved to Florida. I did it without a moments hesitation. I had little doubt that I could make it. I was walking away from what I considered a dead end job (maybe it was, maybe not) with a degree in my hot young hand (I was 38).

I am now 51. Moving and change does not come so easily anylonger. I have so much baggage to haul with me. Mom and Dad, leaving Bridget, leaving my family. The odds of finding a suitable job at 51.

And it is so tempting to go! The things I will leave behind. This boring job (made so because I make it boring), the step daughter who I have never taken to. I realize this is going to be the easies thing for me and the hardest for Zorro, leaving her. Its shameful, but to me that is the Main Reason for moving! Leaving her and her demanding, selfish self absorbed, unfair, gernerally despicable Mother (the ex) behind!

Shame on me! (secretly doing dance of Joy)

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