Tuesday, May 04, 2010

15 minutes to Hang

Had my eval with Heather Be Thy Name last week and it would appear I am destined to be a Biscuit Bucket Flunky. She was not mean in any way, not snide nor did she really criticize me, so it was only when I saw my total score, slept on it and returned the next day when it sunk in.

I flunked! I'm a Biscuit Bucket Flunky.

"You sales number are off", she stated almost in a sympathetic tone, "and Amy asked me what was going on with you and I told her I honestly didn't know. Sometimes I am in the store and you don't realize it until I leave. I stood outside and watched you once. I think you may be tired from working two jobs. But, lately your numbers have improved! You are back in the top two!"

I am thinking, "I'm working nights and closing for God's sake you crazy bitch."

Out loud I did say, "That's because you have had me on the schedule to work Sat and Sun afternoons recently".

Then there was a whole litany of thing I am not doing.....

A flunky, just a flunky. She asked me what I would score myself and I know she speaks the truth, that at times I do not feel like "chatting up" those milling about the store. Once I told her I could read people and she told me I was wrong 90% of the time. I chuckled inside about that because she is such a non-people person, she is a Me Me Me Me person. Any conversation, any statement always makes it way right back to her.

"Heather (Be Thy Name) I have been offered a position at the Mall and I am going to take it. It begins on the 18th and I would like to work part time here. If we could work around the schedule at the Mall."

"Yes, yes. I knew you would find something more suitable to your back ground in time. I was once offered to manager a Mall. But I decided against it....let me know your hours and we will work around it."

She does it to the college kids who desperately need affirmation and encouragement. If one makes the Dean List, Heather Be Thy Name makes sure they know she was on the Deans List for 20 years, because that is how long she went to school to get her 25 degrees.

Anyway, she pissed me off and I am keeping a diary of my work day at Biscuit Bucket, my sales and my executed duties and how well I boss around Candy and maybe Miss Wilma. Miss Wilma is nice enough to let me coach her in the finer art of placing a package of salt water taffy on the top row of the food wall.

Candy will let me instruct her to turn off the lights and for God's Sake, turn down that infernal CD player. Yuck.

It interferes with the sound track of Pleasing People Music. You know the one, it pounds out Zac Brown and George Jones and Dolly.

1 comment:

Lulu LaBonne said...

this job sounds soul sapping - my sympathies sweetie